WE had a "little" scare yesterday and this morning. Yesterday my wife and I took a walk and about 5 minutes into the walk I started to get itchy.
Like all over. I felt like I had fire ants doing the macarana all over me and also in places I didn't know I had.
Of course we walk up to this couple that we always wanted to make friends with and we were talking to them for like ten minutes. I was dying to scratch
"all over" but I didn't want these people to think I had cooties, amphipods or black ich.
The itchyness was unbearable and I know I was squirming so they may have thought I was a Mime, contortionist or Mick Jagger.
I put one foot on top of the other like I was resting my leg, but I was trying to scratch between my toes. It didn't work.
Eventually we left them and I told my wife "We have to go home".
She said Why! Whats the matter? Are you sick? With this virus around everyone is paranoid.
At home I told her what was going on and she insisted on inspecting me. I had this rash all over my body. I generally don't get rashes and I am not allergic to anything. So she rubs this stuff on me which was probably meat tenderizer and the itching subsided a "little".
I figured I would lay down. Yesterday we put this new blanket on the bed, right out of the package.
As I am laying there listening to Vintage Linda Ronstadt, I notice my tongue feels big. I have a big mouth but my tongue usually stays the same size.
My tongue was scraping against the teeth in back of my mouth and It seemed like I was having just a little trouble breathing. Just a little, not enough for me to call a SWAT team or "The Good Doctor" or even "Doctor Who " (it's an English thing, don't worry to much about it)
Now my Girly man emotions kick in and I am getting a touch worried.
I make the mistake of telling my wife who immediately goes into panic mode and wanted to give me CPR and get out the paddles.
She calls our Daughter in Vermont because her husband and Daughter have allergies to everything except air, and not all air.
She tells me to take Bennedril. All I have is our Grand Daughters Bennedril and she is 7. The largest does on the bottle was for a 10 year old so I take about two doses.
In ten minutes I am as Loopy as the people on Circ De Solei . I can't stand up so I go lay on the bed.
My tongue gets bigger. OOOOOooooooNNooooooo. I'm gonna die and Humble won't be able to come here to take my fish. But if he does he will quarantine them in tree stump remover and they will get nightmares.
I look up symptoms of Corona Virus and a big tongue. A rash are about the only things that the virus "doesn't " cause.
So We call my Doctor on the slim chance that he can see me. Here in New York nothing is open, you can't even open a clam.
But the nurse, who I know answered and she said, as long as you don't have Corona Virus symptoms, the Doctor will see you.
Of course If I had Corona Virus symptoms the doctor won't see me and I will have to go to a fortune teller or Lady GaGa concert.
I go there and the guy immediately sees the rash, takes blood, looks in my mouth, listens to my heart and lungs and doesn't have the slightest idea what is wrong with me but says he is getting a lot of patients now that have this from eating meat.
(I have learned that unless you have an arrow sticking out of your head or a crow bar stuck in your nether regions, they won't really know what the diagnosis is)
I almost never eat meat and didn't eat any in a week or so. He gives me a prescription for Prednisone.
Meantime Our Daughter is freeking out because she doesn't want me to go out of the house. It would be hard for the doctor to take blood through my computer screen unless I got really close to it and maybe stuck a USB cable in my arm.
So, I am still alive but the Bennedril is still making me walk like Uncle Festus from the Adams Family.
We think we figured it out. The new blanket my wife put on the bed was the only thing different we did. We bought it last year and one of my hobbies is removing those tags that say "Don't remove under penalty of the law"
So I am not sure where it came from.